Advice for "Famous" People
Navigating MEME coins
As we all know, a lot of celebrities get named in meme coin launches—sometimes indirectly, sometimes even directly. And inevitably, they all tank, wiping out tons of liquidity and making sure that everyone who had hope at one point doesn't have hope anymore. Meaning, everybody loses a damn lot of money and feels like a damn fool, while a very small number of people get really fucking rich.
The other day, a meme coin called Jail Stool launched with a picture of Dave Portnoy as its logo. I might add—Dave Portnoy behind bars. Portnoy then decided to latch onto it, saying he would invest in it as it hit different price milestones. However, the market and the people behind the token had different motives. The token quickly hit around a $200 million market cap before plunging 80% to around $30 million.
However, there was a saving grace—or so it seemed. Portnoy decided to go live on Twitter, and the price started to climb again, with people thinking he would back the coin or somehow prop it up. But like an unscripted loose cannon, he started blaming the crypto industry, telling people he wasn’t behind the coin, that he hated everybody and the coin itself. The price tanked even further.
A day later, he went live on Twitter with David Gokhshtein, who tried to talk him off the ledge. But Dave? He just didn’t get it. He couldn’t understand why people were taking profits instead of just holding and making the price go up. He couldn’t understand why somebody would create a coin in his likeness, and even though he engaged with it, people would still sell into the Portnoy hype.
So, I guess this letter is for Dave. Or anyone who thinks they are influential and wants to make a meme coin.
Number One:
If you didn’t make the meme coin, the first thing you need to do is immediately say you have nothing to do with it. Do not lead people on, do not take responsibility, do not back it, and do not invest in it publicly. If someone else made the coin, they hold all the power—the tokenomics, the contracts, every piece of tech is in their favor. Don’t fucking get involved.
Number Two:
If you do get involved, then congratulations—it’s your token now. That means you assume all responsibility for the ups, the downs, and whether it gets rugged or not. If you go down this path, you better immediately reach out to the developers and understand how it works—or strike a deal with them. Most importantly, if you're going to be involved, communicate 100% transparently about the longevity of “the project” and how you actually plan to protect the people investing in it.
Maybe even come up with some actual utility for the token. If your name is on it, how can you make sure your fans don’t get completely fucked? Maybe if someone holds a certain amount, they get access to a private Q&A, a signed hat, or some other bullshit that at least provides value. But what you don’t do is half-ass support it, then turn around and scream at people for selling when just yesterday you were yelling at them to hold.
Number Three:
If you're famous, the best way to prevent people from using your likeness to make scam coins is simple: make your own fucking coin.
Make it yourself, let everybody know it's the official one, and control the narrative. Hell, you don’t even need to trade it—just mint one, hold it, and call it a day. Or, if you want, make a business around it, create some real utility for your fans, and do it right. Because if you don’t, someone else will—and every single other coin using your name after that will be a scam. Get ahead of it.
Look, if you’re already rich, you don’t need to be scamming people for a couple million more. There’s nothing worse than a famous, influential person launching a meme coin just to rug their supporters. Dave Portnoy, for example, has made around $250 million, as he admitted on Twitter Live. Does he need a couple million more? If so, fuck him. He should be using his star power to build his brand and empower his fans—not fleece them for a few extra bucks.
Long story short:
At this point, any famous person with a fanbase thinking about making a meme coin should get some serious PR consulting. Because someone will make a coin in your likeness. Someone will rug your supporters. And those are yourpeople who will be getting fucked.
If you don’t have PR helping you navigate, negotiate, or crush these scams, then honestly—you’re either lazy or probably fucking liable.
Final Thoughts:
If you’re a "famous" person, feel free to reach out—I’ll help you navigate this shit. It’s simple. Follow these steps, and you won’t look like a clown:
If someone made a coin in your likeness, don’t fucking touch it.
If for some reason you have to get involved, make sure it benefits you and your brand. And if not? Go scorched earth on those motherfuckers.
If nobody has made a token in your likeness yet, make one ASAP, declare it the only legit one, and label everything else a fucking scam.
You don’t even need to trade it. It doesn’t need liquidity. Just make sure you control it.
Thanks for your time.